Q: Do your gifts or giftedness differ from what other people may expect?
Gifts differ. Yes, it is one of my favorite books. I like it because the book explores different facets of individual talents and strengths.
The notion that 'gifts differ' really means something to me. It is not just an idea. It is exactlly what I find in people because the gifted show me. They show me how unique their individual gifts or talents can be. The more diverse gifts I see, the stronger the trust I have. As long as individual gifts differ, hopes are there.
I work with gifted individuals at various age levels. They are uniquely self-driven and particularly sensitive to the values and meaning of life. At the core of their mental energy I can feel the power of passion. It is there. However young, it is already there.Passion first
With that passion, even the very young gifted child can put their motor skills, language skills, spatial skills, sequential skills together and mobilize these skills to acheive some personally important goals as efficiently and effectively as possible. For example, they may make different shapes of playdohs to do farm houses, snack and even character figures to make up stories. They may organize their toys and know exactly when to present which character and how, as well as what to say to form a coherent story with logical sequence. All in all, they employ a wide variety of skills to help them explore and express their ideas, feelings and interests in a creative way.Personality interests.
Driven by passion and orchestrated different skills, the gifted individuals will choose to do something they feel like. In other words, they will have personal preferences. These preferences are substantially predisposed by their personality differences. For example,we won't expect two gifted children at similar age, intellligence level, of same gender, at similar family background and with compatible academic performance to show similar behavior in the way they relate to people, process information and do things when one child is very extroverted and the other one is very introverted. Likewise, a gifted child who is very relationship-oriented, sensitive to how people feel, caring and uncomfortable with arguing and conflicts may set priorities for how they want to learn and contribute in a way different from another gifted child with different personality characteristics. A gifted child who values reasoning, logical thinking, expertise and personal achievement may be more interested in 'KNOWING WHAT TO TO MAKE THINGS WORK EFFICIENTLY' rather than 'LEARNING WHAT TO DO TO CARE For PEOPLE".
We can't overlook how personality characteristics energize gifted individuals. The personal strengths can be magnified tremendously when the gifted individual choose a path compatible with her or his personality characteristics. For example, the path for getting highest level of performance for an introverted person and an extraverted person is very different. The extraverted person may be good at exploring and exploiting his or her social resources and networking whereas the introverted person may be good at building up expert knowledge demanding intense focus, intellectual passion, keen interests in working with ideas and concepts, insightfulness and so on. In other words, people needs different resources, means, facilitative agents, process support and priority for acheiving their highest level of functioning. In short, the path facilitating the competitive advantage of the personality specific strengths is promoting the chance for fruitful and meaningful achievements.Parent-Child Connection
Gifted children are lucky if their individual strengths are found in their parents who have good relationship with them. Sometimes, gifted children shared some strengths with one of their parents who may have difficulty to recognize or appreciate that particular strengths. When parent-child communication is onsistently difficult, the best thing to do is to examine what counter-productive patterns have been established and then explore the personal meaning of these communication patterns to the family members.
The fact is, acceptance of individual differences, even giftedness, talents and personality characteristics, grows out of a long process. It is so hard for the adult caretakers who are uncomfortable with their own personality, strengths and uniqueness, to show acceptance to their children. Only have we been comfortable with our selves, physically, psychologically and spiritually, can we be emotionally available to the children. Too busy things or people associated with stuff of high emotional voltage, the adult caregivers can not have peace in mind and stay relaxed, openminded and positive enough to receive the uniqueness of another individual, however young or old.Personal Growth
It is always important to understand that there is always room for personal growth when we reflect on the interpersonal relationship with our family members. I am not saying we should expect others to seek personal growth all the time. Self commitment to on-going personal growth makes ourselves a powerful change agent in our families. The longer it lasts, the more life changing the outcome.Self Acceptance. When we are comfortable with ourselves, we can build up greater positive energy inside. Then we can appreciate the positive power of our own personality characteristics. With greater positive power of self acceptance, we are more likely to identify strengths in our children and strengths in our selves to accept their soft points and needs. In such a positive emotional environment, we are ready to influence our children by showing our strengths and care to support them. At the same time, we are strong enough to tolerate the weaknesses or challenges we find in our children.
The essence of maximizing different gifts in our gifted children is acceptance. I believe that proper maintenance of mental health care is the bottomline because mental health issues are both the cause and result of failing individual gifts in the family. After all, the most important solution is, not psychiatrist or psychologist, but love. Professional expertise is the means whereas Love is the solution. As gifted individuals, regardless their personality characteristics, are endowed with a more complex brain typical of complex feelings and thought processes. There is nothing trivial to them. Their mind and emotions are always busy because this is how their brain works. In the middle of a stormy ocean of thoughts, knowledge and emotions, I trust that love and only love can calm the storm, calm the fear. Whose love? The love that takes us here. Yes, this is love.
Gifts differ. Yes, it is one of my favorite books. I like it because the book explores different facets of individual talents and strengths.
The notion that 'gifts differ' really means something to me. It is not just an idea. It is exactlly what I find in people because the gifted show me. They show me how unique their individual gifts or talents can be. The more diverse gifts I see, the stronger the trust I have. As long as individual gifts differ, hopes are there.
I work with gifted individuals at various age levels. They are uniquely self-driven and particularly sensitive to the values and meaning of life. At the core of their mental energy I can feel the power of passion. It is there. However young, it is already there.Passion first
With that passion, even the very young gifted child can put their motor skills, language skills, spatial skills, sequential skills together and mobilize these skills to acheive some personally important goals as efficiently and effectively as possible. For example, they may make different shapes of playdohs to do farm houses, snack and even character figures to make up stories. They may organize their toys and know exactly when to present which character and how, as well as what to say to form a coherent story with logical sequence. All in all, they employ a wide variety of skills to help them explore and express their ideas, feelings and interests in a creative way.Personality interests.
Driven by passion and orchestrated different skills, the gifted individuals will choose to do something they feel like. In other words, they will have personal preferences. These preferences are substantially predisposed by their personality differences. For example,we won't expect two gifted children at similar age, intellligence level, of same gender, at similar family background and with compatible academic performance to show similar behavior in the way they relate to people, process information and do things when one child is very extroverted and the other one is very introverted. Likewise, a gifted child who is very relationship-oriented, sensitive to how people feel, caring and uncomfortable with arguing and conflicts may set priorities for how they want to learn and contribute in a way different from another gifted child with different personality characteristics. A gifted child who values reasoning, logical thinking, expertise and personal achievement may be more interested in 'KNOWING WHAT TO TO MAKE THINGS WORK EFFICIENTLY' rather than 'LEARNING WHAT TO DO TO CARE For PEOPLE".
We can't overlook how personality characteristics energize gifted individuals. The personal strengths can be magnified tremendously when the gifted individual choose a path compatible with her or his personality characteristics. For example, the path for getting highest level of performance for an introverted person and an extraverted person is very different. The extraverted person may be good at exploring and exploiting his or her social resources and networking whereas the introverted person may be good at building up expert knowledge demanding intense focus, intellectual passion, keen interests in working with ideas and concepts, insightfulness and so on. In other words, people needs different resources, means, facilitative agents, process support and priority for acheiving their highest level of functioning. In short, the path facilitating the competitive advantage of the personality specific strengths is promoting the chance for fruitful and meaningful achievements.Parent-Child Connection
Gifted children are lucky if their individual strengths are found in their parents who have good relationship with them. Sometimes, gifted children shared some strengths with one of their parents who may have difficulty to recognize or appreciate that particular strengths. When parent-child communication is onsistently difficult, the best thing to do is to examine what counter-productive patterns have been established and then explore the personal meaning of these communication patterns to the family members.
The fact is, acceptance of individual differences, even giftedness, talents and personality characteristics, grows out of a long process. It is so hard for the adult caretakers who are uncomfortable with their own personality, strengths and uniqueness, to show acceptance to their children. Only have we been comfortable with our selves, physically, psychologically and spiritually, can we be emotionally available to the children. Too busy things or people associated with stuff of high emotional voltage, the adult caregivers can not have peace in mind and stay relaxed, openminded and positive enough to receive the uniqueness of another individual, however young or old.Personal Growth
It is always important to understand that there is always room for personal growth when we reflect on the interpersonal relationship with our family members. I am not saying we should expect others to seek personal growth all the time. Self commitment to on-going personal growth makes ourselves a powerful change agent in our families. The longer it lasts, the more life changing the outcome.Self Acceptance. When we are comfortable with ourselves, we can build up greater positive energy inside. Then we can appreciate the positive power of our own personality characteristics. With greater positive power of self acceptance, we are more likely to identify strengths in our children and strengths in our selves to accept their soft points and needs. In such a positive emotional environment, we are ready to influence our children by showing our strengths and care to support them. At the same time, we are strong enough to tolerate the weaknesses or challenges we find in our children.
The essence of maximizing different gifts in our gifted children is acceptance. I believe that proper maintenance of mental health care is the bottomline because mental health issues are both the cause and result of failing individual gifts in the family. After all, the most important solution is, not psychiatrist or psychologist, but love. Professional expertise is the means whereas Love is the solution. As gifted individuals, regardless their personality characteristics, are endowed with a more complex brain typical of complex feelings and thought processes. There is nothing trivial to them. Their mind and emotions are always busy because this is how their brain works. In the middle of a stormy ocean of thoughts, knowledge and emotions, I trust that love and only love can calm the storm, calm the fear. Whose love? The love that takes us here. Yes, this is love.
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